Do not compare yourself, I constantly am reminding myself. Everyone has their own journey and destination and pit stops along the way. It’s so darn hard to not throw up your hands and say I give up, when the thousandth door has closed. You begin to ask.. why? Why God? Why? Why??? Silence.
Romans 12:2 says, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
God’s word promises us, “He (God) has not given us a spirit of fear but of love power and a sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7
When thoughts and emotions rise, we can take heart because God is in control. Our mind has an uncanny ability to make up stories and imaginations but the word says to pull these imaginations down and take captive every thought (stronghold.) 2 Corinthians 10:5
Real talk: I have been blessed to live in Bushwick the past four months. It has been a season. The apartment I currently live in, has thin walls and I can hear ALL things. Everything, in fact.
People have a lot of sex, I hear it; I hear noises a lot. I actually didn’t know people have as much sex as I hear. Didn’t think it was humanly possible. It is. So much so, at work, I started to cringe and hide when I started to hear a similar noise. I would take a breath and realize it was construction or some random door shutting or a pipe bellowing. My body began living in this space of when is the next unwanted sound going to come? Reamining on high alert, ready to escape the scene. Distracted. It left me feeling icky and tense in my own place, and stealing sacred time I would normally use to unwind and relax from the day.
We are natural born story tellers, and shape-makers; creators of good and bad; when I don’t know what’s going on in certain instances, I can creative false truths to help explain something. I am not speaking for every situation and not everyone’s mind works this way. Maybe very few minds work like this and function as such, but logic doesn’t rule my brain. Feelings, emotions, senses, moments capture me; I love to experience experiences. I however do not want to hear people’s sex-capades. My mind becomes angry and disrespected and distracted. (Sometimes it’s comical but not lately.) I must protect my mind from negative thoughts, emotions, and frustrations. If I need help, I cry out to God and ask for wisdom.
Those are my thoughts on the mind. This is an aspect of my life and living situation and I just wanted to be real. Peace.
a hiki i kekahi manawa